What Are You Supposed to Notice During EMDR THERAPY? A Therapist Explains

You've made the brave decision to start EMDR therapy. You’ve heard it can be incredibly effective for processing trauma, anxiety, and deeply held negative beliefs. But as your first session approaches, one big question might be looping in your mind: What am I supposed to notice?

It’s a perfect question. Many people worry they might "do it wrong" or not experience what they're "supposed" to.

First, let's get one thing out of the way. As a therapist, I can assure you: There is no single "right" or "wrong" thing to notice during EMDR.

Your only job is to observe. That's it. You are simply noticing what comes up for you, and your brain is the one doing the heavy lifting.² Think of it like this: a doctor can clean and stitch a wound, but your body is what truly does the healing. In EMDR, your therapist creates the optimal conditions for your mind, brain, and body to heal themselves.

The Most Important Thing to Notice in EMDR THERAPY?: Your Own Unique Experience

The core of EMDR is a state called "dual awareness." This simply means you have one foot in the present moment (in the safe therapy room) and one foot in the past memory you are processing. The goal isn't to re-live the trauma; it's to observe it from a place of safety.

A common metaphor is the train ride. Imagine you are sitting comfortably on a train, with your therapist right next to you. The scenery passing by outside the window is your memory. You might notice the colors, the sounds, and the events in the scenery, but you don't have to get off the train. You are safe inside, simply reporting what you see.

Your therapist will periodically pause the bilateral stimulation (the eye movements, tappers, or tones) and ask, "What are you noticing now?". Again, there is no wrong answer. You simply report, without judgment, whatever came up.

Common Things You Might Notice During EMDR

While every session is unique, here are some of the common categories of experiences people report. You might notice things from one category, or a mix of all of them.

1. Shifts in Thoughts and Beliefs

As you process, your thoughts about the memory (and yourself) may begin to shift. This often happens spontaneously, without you trying to force it.

• You might notice the memory itself becoming blurry, more distant, or less detailed.

• You may have new insights or connections. For example, a thought like, "It wasn't my fault," or "I did the best I could," might spontaneously arise.

• The negative belief you started with (e.g., "I am unsafe") may start to feel less true.

2. A Range of Emotions

Memories are stored with emotions. It's normal for these feelings to surface as they are being processed.

• You might notice waves of sadness, anger, fear, or grief. These feelings can be intense, but they are often brief.

• You might also notice unexpected emotions, or even a lack of emotion.

• Crucially, you will likely notice these feelings begin to fade or lose their "charge" as the sets of bilateral stimulation continue. The distress level you rated at the beginning of the session often goes down.

3. Physical or Body Sensations

Our bodies hold on to trauma, and a key part of EMDR is noticing how your body is responding.

• You might notice a feeling of tension in your chest, jaw, or shoulders beginning to release.

• You may notice sensations like tingling, warmth, or a feeling of lightness spreading through your body.

• You might suddenly realize you were holding your breath and are now breathing more deeply.

• Conversely, you might notice a temporary increase in a physical sensation (like tightness) right before it releases. This is all a normal part of the process.

What If I Notice "Nothing"?

This is a common fear, and it's a valid one. Sometimes, you may feel "stuck" or notice very little. That is also something to notice.

If your therapist asks what you're noticing and the honest answer is "nothing," "I just feel blank," or "I'm just watching the lights," that is the perfect answer. This "stuckness" is valuable information. It might mean your brain is protecting you, or it might be the state you were in during the original event.

Simply report the "nothingness." Your therapist knows how to guide you from there. They might change the speed or type of stimulation, or simply ask you to "go with that," allowing your brain the time it needs.

You Are Not Alone in This Process

The most beautiful part of EMDR is that you are not going through this alone. Your therapist is your guide and your anchor to the present. Their job is to monitor your level of distress, ensure you stay within your "window of tolerance" (where you are feeling, but not overwhelmed), and keep the process moving safely.

Your job is simply to be curious and compassionate with yourself and to trust that your brain knows how to heal.

Ready to Start Your Healing Journey?

If you're tired of feeling "stuck" by past events and are curious if EMDR therapy is the right choice for you, I'm here to help. At Think Well Live Well, I (Becky VanDenburgh) specialize in guiding clients through trauma and anxiety using proven, compassionate methods like EMDR.

You don't have to navigate this alone. Schedule your free consultation   and let's explore how you can start to feel better.